Home > Life or something like it > Entry 08/08/2005 06:37:18 PM – Mentat 181

Entry 08/08/2005 06:37:18 PM – Mentat 181

     Where do I begin… 
     Well, I came home from a particularly shitty day at work, being given all sorts of shit work to do, to find a message on my answering machine that the assignment had been terminated/completed.  Which made me both instantly relieved that I didn’t have to put up with another day’s worth of shit, as well as feeling all sorts of unresolved anxiety.  And three days later since the weekend — I have to admit that I still have all sorts of unresolved shit going through my head from all the nonsense that I had gone through for the last three months there.  I’m seriously thinking of posting the review of the assignment in my Blog just to give people an idea on all the crap I had to put up with. 
     Of course, the worse part about me going through unresolved anxiety almost always means that I don’t sleep right.  Or at all, actually.  Friday night, I think I got something like three hours of sleep.  Then Saturday, it was about five hours in one shot.  Sunday was four hours…  But I made up the remaining sleep Monday during the afternoon after running a couple of errands.  I don’t think I’m going to be sleeping right tonight either, given the way that I napped and how my sinuses hurt when I woke up a couple of hours later.  *sigh*
     Because I didn’t get the sleep I should have Saturday, I totally messed up trying to get over to America’s Best for my Eye appointment.  I thought about going to Lindbergh and then traveling to Five Points and then points East to Avondale…  But then it occurred to me that I could take the Emory bus to Candler Park/Reynoldstown and then to Avondale to get to the appointment.  Of course, I was running late, missed the 75 (Tucker) bus which would’ve put me right there next to the place, and grabbed the 125 instead.  That put me over by Northlake Mall which was like 5 miles away from the North DeKalb Mall which was where America’s Best was. 
     So, instead of going to the appointment, I zipped over to PetSmart to pick up some food for the cat.  Which was fun, as they had other choices for moist food that Cricket seems to be taking to better than the seafood that I’ve had for the last week.   I rescheduled the appointment to today at the same time. 
     Of course, I took the opportunity today to kill two birds with one stone, by not only going to the eye appointment like I was supposed to two days ago, but also headed over to the office to drop off the security card.   But I’m getting ahead of myself…  As it turns out, America’s Best is actually in the Mall.  I wouldn’t’ve guessed, given that I’m rarely at that side of the Mall when I went there.  Most of the time I was over there was because I was going to the movies…  The appointment itself went quick, and well.  The doctor was cool, given how early in the morning it was, and he told me that my eyesight has only gotten slightly worse.  Although I said to him that it’s only been four years since the last time I had an eye (it had been more like seven or so).  He also told me something I should be concerned about.  
     According to what he told me — because of the hypertension that runs (gallops as I said to my Aunt when I got home) — that one of the veins in my left eye was compressing against the artery there and that it should be something I should be concerned about.  He tells me that this is most probably a normal occurrence and that it should be checked yearly to make sure it’s not a problem in the future.  He also warned me of a couple of things that I should watch out for in case it does become a problem (sudden blindness, or blurry vision in one eye, and so on).  But he did give me a clean bill of ocular health, and allowed me to go pick out a couple of pairs of glasses…  Funny thing was that he said to me on the way out that I should go look for a pair of glasses that weren’t quite so big.  I smiled and rolled my eyes — because what I didn’t want to tell him is that the reason why I had picked the ones that I currently wore didn’t make my head look quite so large.  But I did end up picking a pair of more rectangular frames, as well as a pair that had a relaxed frame which is definitely better than the pair that I currently wear. 
     Now I have to wait 5 – 7 days for them to come in. 

     As for the online melodrama…  Lord is there ever a lot of that from this weekend.  Joey for example has finally made it to the permanent ignore basket.  I see positively no reason trying to talk with him primarily because he’s a manic-depressive and goes through the typical phases I find terribly repugnant.  And like Pontius Pilate I wash my hands of mentioning him again in my journal.  Sad twat that he was… 
     But what I want to mention was what set me the fuck off was the bullshit I went through from this guy in Loganville, GA.  Seems that I’ve had a run of "bi-curious" men that see that I’m gay and want to take a taste of what it’s like having sex with another man.  He’s also the second married man that I had a long talk with about cheating on their wives…  Somewhere towards the middle of the conversation of me being the voice of reason and telling him cheating on his wife is not only wrong but dangerous; he says to me something along the lines of "…this isn’t the kind of conversation that he wanted to have…" 
     I  said to myself, damned straight it should. 
     He then shocked the fuck out of me by asking me to "…help find him a man so he can taste what it’s like…" 
     That’s when my blood pressure went through the roof when I realized that he was asking me to pimp for him and find me a man to cheat with. 
     Me?!  The man that thinks it’s wrong to cheat pimping for a fucker than shouldn’t be cheating on someone he’s married to?! 
     I let him have it both barrels because I was just that disgusted with the man. 
     It was because of that bullshit that I had seriously considered opening up some sort of agency in order to report/nark to the wives of these two-faced cheating bastards…  Call it "House-Wreckers, Inc" or some such.  I am just so tired of these fuckers that get married because they can, only to turn around and cheat left and right, and return to their hidden lives because they don’t want to face the consequences about being gay or bisexual in the world today.  Like it’s all that hard nowadays as it was 26 years ago when I came out of the closet. 
     There’s so much more to write — but I’ve been at this on and off for the last five hours.  I’ll write more tomorrow — not that I have much to do…
     Until then…
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