Home > Romance/Relationships > Entry 01/12/2008 02:15:08 PM – Mentat 380

Entry 01/12/2008 02:15:08 PM – Mentat 380

     Well, it’s been a pretty dull couple of weeks since the last time I sat down and wrote.  There hasn’t been all that much going on here at the homestead because, well…  I haven’t really done all that much worth mentioning.  Since the last entry, as I had said, I’m leaving my uncle alone until such time as he shows himself to being a complete tit-head with the aunt and the rest of the relative, or until such time as he can stop acting like a complete child and get his act together.  Personally I’m still banking on him acting like a complete tit-head which means I get the chance of throwing a can of gasoline into the bonfire and watching it go up in some sort of drama explosion. 
     Then I called into the office to tell them that I was available, and given that I didn’t get a call back, I’m fairly certain that it’s just the same old quiet when it comes to the office, it usually means that because it’s the winter, there’s not many assignments on the fire.  Not surprising there…  I’m really beginning to get the impression that the Biggest Little has truly become a state geared towards the Colleges within the area (Brown, Bryant, PC, URI, CCRI, etc), as it seems that the jobs start populating not during the school year, but more toward the summer when the kids get out of college and need a job to keep them in the state.  Feh, not surprising really, given the state of the economy here.

     Not that I’m one to talk about the weather, but we had a wonderful warm snap here for a couple of days this week where the temperatures got into the 60s; allowing me to open the windows and get some fresher air into the place.  Sure it was more than a little bit moist from the humidity of the melting snow, but hey, that’s what the dehumidifier is for.  Which it had kicked on only a couple of times. 
     Of course, the relatives that I’m still talking to began their slow tirade about "global warming" and the ultimate march of the "end might be nearer than we think".  *eye roll*  No really, short memories these people because I seem to remember that back in the 80s when I was in my early 20s the temperatures the week between Christmas and New Years the temperatures got into the 70s, and I was out there at By the River Park on the East Side in summer clothes.  And yet, back then none of them were going on about global warming, or pulling a Chicken Little, instead simply complaining about "…if you don’t like the weather in New England, wait a minute…"  Or let’s not forget in my late teens the time that it snowed in May, or last year when it snowed in April. 

     Since the last time, I’ve been poking around Second Life a bit more, even though I’ve been doing it less with D.  Man, it’s so surreal to me.  Now, I know that the world around me changes every day, that’s to be expected.  But things take weeks and months and even years to change — but there in Second Life the amount of changing that goes on there seems to be proportional to the changes in real time.  Minutes are days and days are months with the changes that I’ve seen there.  Going through the landmarks that I had saved from a year ago, the places that I used to like checking out and watching are either radically changed or completely gone. 
     Hell, I found the Hobo’s Paradise Infohub toward the end of the and the area that it was next to a year ago is by no means what I found recently.  There was a train yard there and the beginning of a mall/plaza there when I first found it about the same time last year.  Now it’s certainly built up with several shopping areas and a couple of plazas.  There’s several different teleports in the area: Stargate, Teleport Pad, Grid Control…  Even saw not too far from the teleport hub (of sorts) the teleport sign for Sapphire Moon which seems to be located at several strategic Infohubs.  Haven’t figured out the pattern to the locations, but I’m sure they’re to be found anywhere near the more established Infohubs…  Although I haven’t found the one near Hyles yet (which is a very established Infohub).  Hyles and Baileya…  Have they changed as well.  The Coney Island part of Baileya is clearly established (which it was only just starting to have vendors in a year ago).  Although the section of Hyles that has some sort of housing district is still closed off to the general public. 
     Oh, and the Linden Castle near to Uzume is clearly open to the public now.  It was certainly a disappointment to go walking in there and seeing it to be nothing more than an over-glorified shopping plaza with a church…  There was a hidden gem there though that I’ll try to take a picture or two of it the next time I’m there.  Over to the side of it was a door with skulls on it that while didn’t blend well with the world around it, caught my attention and gave me the clear impression of being a door.  Sure enough it was, and going into it, it turned out to be an underground crypt/vault like you find underneath the cities in France and Italy.  Going further down into it, and past the crypt marked 333 (for partially evil), you’ll find an underground bar/nightclub of sorts that gave me the clear impression of being populated by Goths, and vampire wannabes.  While there was no one there, I was fairly certain it’s still in use… 
     *smiles*  One night this week, I think I’ll show off some of these places to D and see what he thinks of them.  Seems that D likes it when I’m giving him the tour of the place, as he made it once to SL on his own, and felt more than a little bit lost checking out some of the places that he had gone to.  I think it has to do with the fact that he doesn’t understand the interface like I do and seems a little lost trying to figure it out…  Next time though I’ll show him a little of the controls… 

     Speaking of D, had an interesting time with him the other day with him…  We were talking about his job and how he’s getting pretty sick and tired with the way that they dick him around and screw with his schedule, and that he’s thinking about going to do something else with his life.  So, I suggested that perhaps he should consider the possibility of getting some of his poetry and prose published.  This prompted him to be rather hard on himself saying that he’s not a writer, and certainly not worthy of publishing. 
     I naturally believe otherwise considering that I’ve read through his poetry and think it’s got the necessary umph to impact other people’s lives.  So, then I suggest to him that he should take some of the poems and prose that he approves of and upload them to Fiction Press (http://www.fictionpress.com). 
     He fought me a bit more about this, coming down really hard on himself and being hyper-critical of his work. 
     In the end though, I won out telling him to trust me in this, as the use of Fiction Press will allow him to get a temperature of what other people think about his work. 
     This was a week ago…
     This week, he’s more than thankful for taking my advice as he’s been favorited by several of the denizens of the place and people have given him positive reviews of his poetry.  *chuckles* As of yesterday he went rushing over to check out to see how many more hits he’s gotten since the last time he’s checked.  Perhaps I’ll even get him to post some of his poetry over at Deviant Art (http://www.deviantart.com) and see what kind of reviews and hits he gets there. 
     Shameless plug for his work at Fiction Press here –>  (http://www.fictionpress.com/u/594711/)

     I also finally finished posting my five part story Companion to Fiction Press.  While I might not be favorited, I’ve gotten a review that I’m rather satisfied with, even though it was the same reaction I had received from friends that had read it.  That is, frustration with me, given the way that it ended.  When I got D’s URL for Fiction Press, I checked the hits on it and it’s just under 300 at the moment.  While I’m not sure the hits indicate it being read from beginning to end, at least it’s enough for people to want to check out, even if they don’t comment on it.
     The one person that reviewed it also requested that the story continue…  While I’m not sure I could continue it in the vein that it had originally been written in — as it was written sometime during the dark time after my breakup with Rick, and the subsequent time when I was seriously going through commitment and trust issues — I have sufficient material and brainstorming that I might be able to put together another five part story that continues from the ending of Companion.  
     But I might not be getting to that yet.  I think the next short story I upload is the one involving Tommy and I…  I’ve been trying to clean up the three part e-mail that I had written to Matty in the hopes of making it into a fleshed out story, instead of bare bone facts. At the moment though, I put it to the back burner because when I was writing it, I realized that I had missed certain key facts of the building of my relationship with Tommy.  Not surprising given that I have a habit of shading over parts because I fear reliving some of the pain that’s associated to the memories.  Such is the curse of having an eidetic memory. 

     Things with D go really well…  While the excitement’s still there, the calmness that comes from spending time together is certainly a welcome addition to the time we spend together in text and in voice chat during the wee hours of the night…  A friend of mine checked out his blog at Spaces (http://spaces.msn.com) and can clearly see the love that D has for me, which he had warned me carefully about it…  While I will address his concerns in private, given the lackadaisical approach I’ve had with e-mail the last couple of months since I’ve been a complete slacker about it, I’m going to set the record straight here.  Part of the reason has to do with the fact that I haven’t made it as clear as I should, partially because I know it’ll be seen before I actually sit down and write the e-mail. 
     The feelings that I have for D are mutual.  They go as deep for him as his feelings go for me.  While sure I am naturally cautious, I have to say that in meeting D, every piece of information that he has given me has matched what I have been able to determine — which is assuredly better than what I’ve found of most people on the Internet the last 4 years. 
     Yes, I’m aware there’s an age difference between the two of us…  Enough that it makes me look like his father rather than his equal, but when he and I are together…  No defenses…  No masks…  And distractions…  He and I are quite equal.  The pains, the agonies, the hope, even the optimism — although D doesn’t express his as openly as I do.  We laugh, we play, we snark, we get serious…  D is (not surprisingly) a hell of a lot more mature and responsible than many of the men closer to my age that I have encountered, which most assuredly a relief, as the last thing I want to deal with is someone that’s going into their 40s and acting like they’re going through their second childhood.  Please…  It’s annoying, and a complete turn off, not to mention a complete waste of time and not something I need to be dealing with at this point in my life. 
     My friend Ed is sort of happy (in that quirky gloating and prideful sort of way that he has) that I’ve stopped being ageist about meeting and being intimate with another man, and said to me last month that he was glad that I found someone that I could relate to, regardless of age.  Me?  God, I haven’t been this happy in a long, long time…  And I’m glad and thankful for meeting D because he understands me in a way no one else does, or had taken the time to understand me… 
     So, if this is coming off as defensive to the point of being borderline antagonistic…  All I can say about this is that I’m prepping for the coming adversity, as I’m sure there will be a whole lot of other people in D and my life that won’t be approving in the least…  I’m willing (and able) to fight for this, and will do so because that is how strongly I feel for him. 

     Well that’s about it for the time being.  I’ve been at this long enough and I think I’ve covered everything I need to cover at the moment.  Off to wreck havoc.  Until the next time.
Categories: Romance/Relationships
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