Home > Life or something like it > Entry 10/27/2009 03:00:41 AM – Mentat 538

Entry 10/27/2009 03:00:41 AM – Mentat 538


     I am a glutton for punishment…  I knew I was going to be getting all sorts of morally sick by sitting here and picking up Save Me, but there was just something about it that I wanted to see.  Sure, part of the reason was to see another movie with Chad Allen as an adult, considering that I remember seeing him as a teenager, back in the days when he starred in an episode of TNG.  And part of the reason was to see what sort of dramatic range he has since I’ve sat there watching him through the four Donald Strachey movies that I’ve seen (of which 3 that I own).  And yet, every time I hear that lifestyle, and anything Christianity is against the homosexual lifestyle and I cringe mentally and emotionally (and even physically) because it goes against everything that I’ve come to understand and know about the universe and everything in between.  Then again, I admit to also being a masochist when it comes to moral dilemmas that every part of my being fights against…  As well, as watching how Hollywood seems to have this nasty habit of trying to tell stories through the use of stereotypes in order to make a point within the current movie. 

     I have written journal entries upon journal entries covering the subject in the past.  From brainwashing nightmares that go horribly wrong, to narrow-minded viewpoints trying to push an agenda for something that really shouldn’t have an agenda.  Centuries of dogma…  Xenophobic hatred and fear…  Pogrom-like assaults on what is in nature calling it an abomination of against humanity.  All stemming down to humanity trying to destroy and brush under the rug, something because it’s looked upon as abhorrent to the continuation of a species; which a species is already overpopulated to almost a breaking point.  Yet, I still continue to fight the demon that has been cast within me, because there are some in the world that cannot and will not accept that love can be expressed as man to man, woman to woman, and man to woman.  Even though within me, I have finally come to peace with accepting the myriad of combinations — some that even the monogamous can occasionally having issues with handling. 


     Further, I was also a glutton for punishment for Stargate Universe, but fortunately for me that masochistic gluttony has come to an end.  I’ve come to the realization as I tried to sit through the last episode of the show and only getting about 20 minutes into it, that the producers of the show have been trying entirely too hard to be in your face…  Gritty might work — but if the gritty is too course…  if it’s trying too hard to being a threat without actually having much consequence (as television normally does) then it only ends up being melodramatic, and poorly melodramatic at that.  Yes, the cash cow that was Stargate has been milked enough, and I fear that both SyFryed as well as MGM are going to have a bomb on their hands in no time…  Then again, given that sci-fi is on the outs on public (and cable) television once again, I fear more that fans are going to put up with seasons of this bullshit pandering if only because of the motto I’ve been hearing too much on Usenet that "…Bad sci-fi (on television) is far better than no sci-fi at all…" 

     Really, if only fans knew what they wanted and actually wrote what they wanted to producers in Hollywood instead of settling up, who knows?  Maybe we could end up with another Babylon5, or a TNG that actually could go up against prime time and actually be liked.  Then again, I believe that pigs will eventually have wings, and we might even see pork in the treetops one sunny morning… 


     I’ve been getting used to the schedule change, and while the first two days of the new schedule were completely screwed up and upside-down toward the end of the week it was more like what I had gotten used to for the weekends.  The good thing is that with the new hours, and my time being split up, I don’t quite feel so tired at the end of the work week, and further I don’t feel so desperate for finding things to do/watch/destroy at the end of three days off.  The bad thing is that because my time off is near to the time off for my old schedule, I find I have a difficult time knowing which day it is.  Sunday nights, feel like Monday and when Monday rolls around, I actually think it Tuesday.  By the time I roll into work on Tuesday night I don’t even know what day it is, and it takes another day before I realize it’s Wednesday is the end of Wednesday night, and I have another day off. 

     I’m pretty sure that I’ll be all right in a month or so.  Then again, it’ll be vacation time, and things will be totally unhinged.  Woo… 


     Not too much else to write at the moment.  Off to try to finish this movie and hope that I don’t have some sort of emotional convulsion in the process.  *grinning*  Until the next time.

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